Last night as I went to bed, I wrote down my gratitudes and set the intention to explore my hesitations while I slept. What were these underlying fears and how could I address them head on? The roots of what I saw were in the box of labels. Primarily, what's in a name? There is actually confusion in my name because some people in my life call me by my legal name, Amanda. While others know me as Rey, the name I say I prefer. The truth is my preference is AmandaRey, both sides of myself as one individual. But I had stopped introducing myself that way because often people think Rey is my last name and just call me Amanda, which is my least preferred. In my dream, by not knowing my own name, I also could not name my friends. Which ones were real? The ones that had known me longest or the ones that know me as Rey? And if the ones that know me as Rey were somehow not as genuine, did that mean that I was not as genuine? In waking, I explained the dream to my fiancé who has also faced the struggle of what name to use for me in different company. His take is that a name is a label given to you before birth and therefore does not define you. We talked about the differences in culture. Here if you ask "who are you" a name is usually given in reply and if you ask "what do you do" a job title is the most common answer. Yet these are not really accurate answers to the generic and wide scope of the questions. What do you call yourself is more accurate a question to learn someone's name and yet that is very rarely our wording even though that is the translation of how many other cultures speak. The truth is none of these labels (Amanda, AmandaRey, or Rey) are WHO I am. Who I am is a playful sprite with a huge heart that strives to help others in any way I can while doing my best to live a grateful, loving life. And even that is just scratching the surface of the descriptions and labels I could use. We are all such dynamic and unique people, how could we possibly condense ourselves down to just a few adjectives in a sentence? And more importantly, how do those labels and descriptors define our relationships and our friendships? I know who my friends are, not by what they call me, or by how they know me, but by their heart. I know which relationships are healthy and loving and which will stay surface friendships because the truth is in our interactions. Yes, I am sometimes playfully childish. No that does not effect me being an Empowerment Coach. My name is AmandaRey and I am blessed to have friends on all sides of that name. I'm grateful for dreams that bring things to the surface for me to explore. I'm grateful to know that who I am is ever shifting and changing and yet always perfectly me. I'm grateful to know that a name is just a label and I do have the choice on which one I use. I'm grateful for all my friends that are patient as I try out the different names and labels to see what fits best for me. I'm grateful for amazing friends that genuinely connect with their hearts. I'm grateful for a wonderful fiancé that is also a great sounding board for me. I'm grateful or the way my mind works to explore the uncomfortable, dissect the traditional, and write my own answers from what I learn. I'm grateful for who I am and I'm grateful to know that it is a dynamic and fluid definition. What do you call yourself? Is it a name or a definition of who you are? If you could pick five characteristics to describe yourself, what would they be? How do those align with your name? May your day be blessed with loving and understanding people in your life. May you find your own truth within the name and labels you choose. Thank you for following along with my journey. Have a beautiful day!
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