I would make jokes and say something outlandishly large that I knew the person wouldn't buy or I would ask for something small so that I wouldn't feel bad. After some self-exploration I learned this was a combination of feelings of unworthiness and not wanting to come off as "bratty". I have made some progress in asking for things but it still usually fall in either the need category or an activity that I would like to do with someone. Mostly the latter is because I honestly do enjoy activities and time together more than just stuff.
Yet my husband brought up the other day that one of his love languages is to give gifts and I make that challenging because he wants to get things that I truly want, not just stuff. It reminded me that there may still be some work to do in that area. And starting a baby registry has opened that up even more on what areas need explored, especially as some baby items can get pretty pricey.
I don't have the answers today. I have not adjusted my mindset in a day. But I wanted to share my gratitude today on this awareness because I think it is a common challenge. How do we ask for what we want? How do we balance asking and the old mindset it may stir?
I'm grateful for my husband's honesty. I'm grateful he is so thoughtful and generous to always be getting me little things to show his love. I'm grateful to have a pretty clear definition of want versus need in my life. I'm grateful for all my parents have done for me, both the the things they have bought with money and the actions they do in love. I'm grateful to say that I am spoiled, I am aware of it, and I'm pretty good at not letting it go to my head. I'm grateful to know that I don't need a whole lot of stuff because my heart is filled by the people around me. And I'm grateful to re-explore this challenge of asking.
What do you want? Do you struggle to ask for the things you need?
May today bless us on our individual journeys. May the ah-ha moments be loving and move us forward. Have a beautiful day!